8.25.2009

Bald? Maybe Later.

I've been in a bit of a funk lately, as far as my hair goes. My wounds from last week have healed completely, but my hair remains, about 1/8" long. I have been a bit stressed lately and can't be bothered with shaving my head when a shorter shower means more sleep. This should concern me a bit, since the summer is drawing to a close and my allottment of bald-time is almost over; I should be shaving my head every day for as long as I can get away with it.**

I was posting on the LTAH boards the other day and the topic was 'brows or browless'. There are some women who can totally rock this look (there were some photos posted on the thread, and the first girl was absolutely adorable). I am not one of those women who look great with no eyebrows.

The first time I shaved my head I also shaved my eyebrows. I did it partly because the idea of being completely hairless was pretty hot, but also a little out of spite, since the guy I was dating was really not a fan of bald women and he refused to even entertain the idea that I might actually look pretty good. I knew that if I shaved my eyebrows I would be more of a 'freak' to him. Our relationship was already on the rocks and I had tried to dump him a few weeks before but he wanted a second chance. I agreed to give him a month to change the things that needed to change. We were nearing the end of the probationary period and hadn't done anything he said he would do.

Anyway, after I shaved my eyebrows I still drew them on every day. This was a colossal pain in the ass, but I was afraid that maybe people would figure me out. When they finally started to grow back they were pretty wonky. I was waxing them one day to try to coax them into a better shape and accidentally ripped out half of the left one. I cursed for a moment and then decided to wax them off completely since I was beyond the point of damage control; I was still having to fill them in every day anyhow.

After the second removal I was no more fond of the way it looked and I was tired of having to pencil in my eyebrows. I had an epiphany: if they make wigs and false eyelashes, why not false eyebrows? Sure enough, a google search turned up a cancer website that sold this particular type of falsies. I ordered a couple different kinds and was pretty stoked when they were delivered.

After trimming them to the desired shape, I experimented with the two different types of adhesive to see how hard it would be to put these things on. One of the adhesives was the color and texture of school glue, and the other was spirit gum. I couldn't get it right with the latter, so I went with the former.

This was mid- to late-summer, and the heat and humidity combined with the body heat I generated at work caused the glue to re-liquify and it started to bead around the edges. Whenever I would wipe it away it would just dry to a film beneath my brow bone. I was worried all the adhesive that had oozed out would cause the prosthetics to not stick anymore. Needless to say, I only wore them again once or twice.

Strangely enough, after waxing my eyebrows they grew in a lot better. It did take more than a year to grow back as thick as they were and I still don't get much growth at the outer corners. Ce'st la vie.

**After I started this post I did end up taking a shower and shaving my head. I would have to say that my hair was closer to 1/4" when I took the trmmers to it to remove the bulk.

8.17.2009

Bald and... Something

So, I cut myself pretty badly a few days ago. Maybe I'm losing my mojo?

8.11.2009

Being Bald Gets Rough

I cut myself shaving a couple of days ago and I hadn't shaved so my scalp had some time to heal. I was in the shower today and thought boyfriend had changed the HeadBlade, so I knicked myself on the third or fourth swipe.

I could feel the blade catch where it should have been able to glide easily, and immediately stopped. I slashed myself pretty badly the last time I cut myself with the HeadBlade because I didn't stop and switch out the cartridges. Today the cartridges weren't in the shower where I had left them. I didn't want to dry off to get them, or track water across the floor trying to find them, so I switched over to the razor I use to shave everything else.

I had forgotten how tedious it is to shave with a regular disposable razor, and also how difficult it is to get a truly smooth shave; of course, I didn't go over it a second time like I usually do since I was only continuing the shave so as to not look half done, but I still would have liked a smoother shave.

For a couple of hours it was crazy smooth if I rubbed my head in the direction of the hair growth, but it wasn't long before it didn't feel so smooth anymore no matter which way I rubbed it. Getting in to bed tonight, I snuggled behind boyfriend to suck out some of his warmth and when I kissed the back of his neck I could tell that he had shaved in the shower. Further groping led to groping even more because I think this is the smoothest shave I've ever felt on him. I am a bit envious and looking forward to shaving tomorrow to see if I can't get my bald head as soft and smooth as his.

Cross your fingers for me.

8.06.2009

Bald and Liberated

As I've said before, the sexual appeal of shaving my head is greatly increased when combined with domination and humiliation. It's good for me when boyfriend and I are role playing and he threatens to shave my head and drop me on the corner with nothing, wondering who will ever take in such a dirty bald slut. Or when he ties me up and punishes me for shaving my head against his wishes, or for having too much hair at the end of the day when he has explicitly demanded that I be bald and smooth all the time*.

Since I first started shaving my head I have discovered the tiny feminist in me. I realized that I look great with no hair and that it's okay for me to look great with no hair. It has made me challenge people's ideas of 'what a woman should look like'. Small children ask their mothers if I am a boy or a girl, knowing that I am a girl (or why would they ask?) but confused by my lack of a feature that they have always used to determine gender. I'm sure guys with ponytails get the same thing.

Yesterday I was at the grocery store and I saw a family with two young kids, the boy sporting a mohawk. Mid-sentence he stopped and stared at me while I was walking by, and said, "Wow! She doesn't have any hair!" It was not spoken in the same 'you're different and that means that you are weird' tone that I usually get when kids comment on my haircut. I waved at him and kept moving down the aisle, and as I was walking away I heard his sister say, "She is a girl. She just has a different haircut." Smart kids. At work a couple of days ago another young kid said that I was 'girlish-boyish'. I think that was the first time that I was not annoyed by a child's comments about my shaved head.

I hope that seeing a woman with a shaved head has changed the children's ideas of what a person with certain junk should look like, and I hope that it has done the same for the adults I come in contact with. That said, I have to wonder how far back I'm sending feminism when I want my boyfriend to berate me and punish me for being bald.

*He actually likes my 8-hour grit, saying that it gives me some texture and the velcro effect gives him something to grab onto.